How Parenting Style Change A Child’s Personality
How parenting style change a child’s personality. Being a parent is a joy in itself for married adults. To carry out the trust entrusted to us by God, which is to have children who must be properly educated and developed.
Many factors influence the formation of personality in children. According to Sigmund Freud in the theory of psychoanalysis, the development of a child’s personality is influenced by what he received during the heyday, namely the first 0-6 years of life and the ability to go through each phase of development, if a child gets a good education and care, it will produce children have a good personality like an adult.
The first environment a child encounters is a family consisting of father, mother, and siblings. In interaction, a child adapts to what is seen and learned in the family. A child raised by a family with high emotional intensity will affect his emotional intelligence as he grows up.
Good care and education from the family are essential in shaping the child’s personality. The definition of family can be seen in the narrow sense, as a nuclear family which is the smallest social group of society formed based on marriage and consists of husband (father), wife (mother), and their children.
Each family has a different parenting style in educating the child and is usually passed down by the parents received from the previous parents. Parenting can be defined as a pattern of interaction between children and parents that includes the fulfillment of physical needs (such as eating, drinking, etc.) and psychological needs (such as safety, love, etc.), as well as the socialization of norms that occur in society. so that children can live in harmony with their environment (Latifah, 2011)
In other words, parenting also encompasses patterns of parent-child interaction in the context of children’s character education. So the style played by parents in developing the character of children is very important, whether authoritarian, democratic, or permissive. The form of parenting affects the formation of the child’s personality after he or she grows up.
This is because the characteristics and elements of an adult character are planted long before the seeds are planted and implanted into a person’s soul from the beginning, that is when he or she is still a child. That is, parental treatment of their children from an early age will affect their social and moral development in adulthood.
These social and moral developments will shape the character and attitudes of children in the future, although several other factors influence the formation of children’s attitudes reflected in the character they have. According to Megawangi (2003), children will grow into individuals who have character if they can grow in an environment that has character, so that the nature of each child born pure can develop optimally.
Since the child’s environment is not just a micro-family environment, all parties including family, school, mass media, the business community, etc. also influence the development of children’s character. In other words, developing the next generation with good character is the responsibility of all parties.
The importance of character building in the family can also be seen from the results of Fika and Zamroni’s study that parents educate their children’s character through good parenting, give examples of behaviors and habits, provide explanations for actions, apply high standards and realities to children, and involve children in decision making.
The results of character education in the family show that children who grow up in a complete family feel more satisfied with their love, fewer children have problems and freedom, and children become more obedient. In providing care and education to children, each family has a different parenting style from one family to another.
In the book on adolescent psychology, parenting is the attitude and way of parents in preparing younger family members including children to be able to make their own decisions and act independently until they experience a change from relying on their parents to be independent and responsible to themselves alone.
Monks et al provide an understanding of parenting as a means, i.e. fathers and mothers providing love and parenting that have a profound influence on how children view themselves and their environment. Research shows that parenting is important in providing a more complete model of behavior for children.
The role of parents in caring for children is not only important to protect the child’s mental development from negative things, but also to shape their character and personality so that they become spiritual beings who are always obedient to their religion. This paper is qualitative research that focuses on library research.
By reviewing books and manuscripts relevant to the problems raised in this study. The data source used is divided into two primary and secondary forms. Primary data is a book that serves as the main guide in the form of research on parenting styles and parenting strategies.
Meanwhile, secondary data is a book that is still considered relevant to research studies. The method of analysis used is descriptive analysis, which is used to determine the relationship between categories and others, through interpretation according to the study map guided by the problem being studied in the purpose of research, to create the construction of the theory according to the research problem (Surakhmand, 1980: 93 ).
Factors Affecting Child Development. Health and Wellness Health and well-being are some of the factors that a child must have to grow well. The psychological development of a child also depends on the physical growth and health of the child.
Malnutrition during infancy will cause the baby to not grow well and become damp. Very serious nutritional deficiencies are called marasmus and kwashiorkor. Marasmus is a serious dietary measure caused by inadequate calorie intake.
Babies with marasmus are small, thin, and look older. Kwashiorkor is a serious nutritional deficiency caused by a lack of protein. The child’s stomach and legs are swollen with water.
The disease usually appears between the ages of 1 to 3 years. Marasmus and kwashiorkor are serious problems in developing countries, with 50% of deaths under the age of 5 (UNICEF, 2003). Lack of nutrition in children such as lack of iron, vitamin, or adequate protein causes low immunity to disease.
Children who are malnourished at 3 years of age show more aggressive and hyperactive behavior at 8 years of age, have more external problems at 11 years of age, and show excessive motor behavior at 17 years of age (Liu et al., 2003). leads to the health and well-being of children such as poverty, poor health care, malnutrition, drug, and alcohol abuse.
The responsibility for the health and well-being of the child lies in the hands of parents, teachers, nurses, doctors by familiarizing the child with a healthy life. Parents are expected to instill healthy habits in their children so that they can help their children get good health and nutrition.
Meanwhile, teachers in schools are expected to have strategies in implementing a healthy lifestyle in the school environment to prevent disease outbreaks in children in the school environment. Meanwhile, doctors and nurses provide socialization to the community on how to adopt a healthy lifestyle. b. Family and Child Care Every family is a system, a unit formed by interconnected and interconnected parts.
Relationships never go one way. In a family, the interaction between family members is expected to be two-way. Santrock (2007: 157) states that bilateral interaction in the family is called helping each other, which means that each person’s behavior depends on the behavior of his previous partner.
Positive reciprocal relationships between parents and children influence the way a child behaves towards both parents. A family is a group of subsystems called generation, gender, and role. Each family member is a participant in several subsystems. According to Cox & Paly (2003) subsystems in each family affect each other either directly or indirectly.
Family members consisting of two people are called dyadic, while more than two people are called polyadic. Mother and father are the dyadic subsystems, mother and father represent the polyadic system, mother and two siblings are other polyadic systems (Santrock, 2007: 158). The results of research (Cumminghams et al, 2002) state that increased marital satisfaction can result in better parenting. well, marital relationships, childcare, and behaviors influence each other, either directly or indirectly.
The development of a child’s personality begins with the child’s interaction with his or her family. Positive acceptance, sincere love, and good parenting will shape the character of the child as the child grows up.
A child raised with comfort and love in the family will surely make the family a place to share grievances, and conversely, if a child does not find comfort in the family, he or she will find a way out of the home resulting in the child confused about identity. himself.
The family has a very important role to play in developing the child’s personality. Loving parental care and education on the values of life, both religious and socio-cultural, is a conducive factor in preparing children to become healthy individuals and members of society.
Alexander A Schneiders (1960: 405) argues that the ideal family is characterized by the following characteristics: minimum disputes between parents or parents and children; there is an opportunity to express a desire; full of love; the use of moderate discipline; there are opportunities to be independent in thinking, feeling and behaving; mutual respect, respect between parents and children; parents have stable emotions; advanced in the economy; practicing moral and religious values.
If the family is unable to perform or perform these functions, it is called family dysfunction. According to Dadang Hawari (1997: 165), a child raised in a dysfunctional family will have a greater risk of growth and mental development.
Erick Erikson suggests eight stages of psychological development in a person’s life and it all depends on the experiences he or she goes through in the family. In the first year, a child must develop basic beliefs, in the second year he must develop autonomy, and in the following year, he must learn initiatives that lead to the discovery of his own identity.
A healthy family climate or the attention of loving parents is an important factor that facilitates the psychological development of the child. Personality is a series of inactive behaviors performed by individuals in dealing with received stimuli. The factors that shape a person’s personality are genetic and environmental.
Genetic factors in psychology are known as nativism theory, while environmental factors are known as empiricism theory. Environmental factors that shape a child’s personality are a group of behaviors that are accepted from childhood to adulthood. The role of the environment is very important in shaping the personality of the child.
The role of the environment in it includes the patterns and habits of parenting that are applied by parents to children from an early age. Several types of parenting styles can be applied to children and the resulting behavioral effects, namely: c. Education Children’s education is derived from the school environment, which is a formal institution that conducts guidance, teaching, and training programs to help students develop their potential, both from a moral-spiritual, intellectual, emotional, and social aspect.
According to Havighurst (1961: 5) schools have an important role or responsibility in helping students achieve their developmental tasks. Schools should strive to create a conducive climate, or conditions that can make it easier for students to achieve their developmental tasks.
The school’s efforts to facilitate the development of students will be successful if the school has created a healthy climate or environment, concerning the management and professionalism of its officers. good or develop academic achievement.
Social skills, politeness, positive attitude towards learning, low student absenteeism, and provide skills that allow students to work. Effective schools are not only characterized by the above characteristics but are also supported by the quality of teachers, both personal characteristics and competencies.
The personal characteristics and competencies of teachers greatly influence the quality of the classroom climate, the learning process in the classroom, or the relationship between teachers and students in the classroom which in turn will influence student learning success Allan C Orsnstein (1990: 549) suggests research results stating that characteristics -characteristics of effective teachers or hopefully it is classified into four-dimensional groups of teachers, namely creative characterized by imaginative behavior, easy to experiment, and original; dynamic behavior, i.e. energetic and extroverted; orderly is characterized by behavior that has goals, is good at finding ways to solve problems, and has control. Education given to children is obtained from formal education and education from parents.
In providing education, several factors influence the achievement of children’s educational success. According to Albert Schweitzer, (in Yusuf S, 2012: 47) effective education that can be given to children is as follows: first, that is modeling, where parents make themselves a model for children, parents are the first model and most important for positive children. nor is it negative.
The way children think and behave is formed from the way parents think and behave. Through modeling, a child will learn about proactive attitude, respect, and love. The second education is to make parents as mentors, where parents make themselves the first mentors for children in establishing relationships and giving deep love, both positively and negatively. Parents are the first source for the development of children’s feelings such as feeling safe, loved.
There are five ways to give love to children, namely: listening and feeling what the child feels; sharing views, knowledge, emotions, and beliefs with children; giving reinforcement, trust, appreciation, and encouragement to children; sincerely pray for the child and sacrifice to the child in terms of availability of time and serve the needs of the child.
The third education that parents need to do for their children is teaching, where parents act as teachers for their children on the basic laws of life. Parents strive to strengthen the principles of life so that they understand and apply them. The role of parents as teachers is to create “shared competence”, where children know and experience what they are doing and the reasons they exercise this right.
The development of a child’s personality is influenced by genetic and environmental factors. The family has an important role in shaping the personality of the child because the family is the first madrasah in life. In the process of parenting, every parent has a different parenting style.
There are three types of parenting styles used by parents in caring for their children. The first parenting style is authoritarian parenting. This parenting style reflects the attitude of parents who are firm and tend to be discriminatory. This is characterized by the child’s pressure to comply with all parental orders and wishes, very strict control over the child’s behavior, the child does not gain parental trust, the child is often punished, if the child gets the achievement, he is rarely given praise or gifts.
The results show that children of authoritative parents have greater stress than children raised by receptive parents. The second parenting style, which is democratic parenting, this parenting has the recognition of the ability of parents, children are allowed to not always depend.
This parenting style educates and gives responsible freedom to children. By having responsible freedom, children will be able to develop their potential properly. The third parenting style is permissive parenting.
Permissive parenting allows children to act according to their wishes, parents do not give punishment and control. This parenting style is characterized by the existence of unlimited freedom for children to act according to their own will, parents never give rules and instructions to children, so that children will behave according to their own will.
The education and care of parents in shaping the personality of the child is also determined by the method chosen by the parents. There are several methods that parents can use, namely the exemplary method; nature; attention; advice, and punishment.